What's there to say about a SpongeBob SquarePants game that's finally not centered around the titular sponge itself? Surprisingly, more than you expect, but less than you hope.
The easiest way to describe The Patrick Star Game is that it's Nickelodeon's attempt to replicate the Goat Simulator series: a pure sandbox map, no real goals or plot, with missions and activities to complete from a familiar character. It's a departure from the platform-centric elements of Battle for Bikini Bottom and The Cosmic Shake, and a refreshing way to let loose in this charming world. Only it never does much to wow, doesn't carry enough of the humor the animated series was once known for, and is – for lack of a better word – pretty corny. I know, so is Goat Simulator, but here it's not good.
Before I go too far bashing your poor favorite starfish, let me make something clear: I still had enough fun playing this game, even as a 26-year-old man — but I did grow up with the show it's based on. Still, as a working adult, I probably wouldn't have spent the £30 to £35 they charge for this experience. It's not outrageous, and maybe there will be more value and longevity to entertain your child, but it was a higher question than I expected after playing it for a while.
Okay, now I'm done kissing. This is a game where you don't really have to think. About anything. And it is so wonderful. You just run around, talk to different characters – who have the original voice cast – and take part in some odd tasks. Dig for treasure in the dump, race around the driving school, find gloves in Glove World, or participate in an Overcooked mini-game where you try to make Krabby Patty orders in an act of free labor for a certain cheap crab. I'm glad it turned out this way; the story-driven platformers can be great, sure, but to step away from a game focused on Patrick and just do things – That is the best way for it, I feel.
Do some sort of task that doesn't really need any explanation, whether it's removing the public from Squidward's sunbathing area or skydiving with Sandy, and earn Sand Dollars. It's not really a real currency though – more of a point for how much you've done, and the more you earn, you'll automatically unlock various iconic outfits that call back to classic episodes of the TV show. It's a nice touch and a way to get even more references into the game for fans of the series, but when it relies heavily on references over some new humor or personality, it fails to reach beyond a good experience.
As for feeling pretty nasty, it's a physics-based sandbox that has a dedicated world reset option because it knows the world is going to get messy, fast. But aside from times when I needed to reset everything due to an obstacle of my own making, there were other times when I needed to restart a mission I'd already spent some time on because it just… broke.
I had found 24 out of 30 targets for a specific mission, and after a while of searching, no others were there. It wasn't even all over the map, just a specific location, and I made sure I wasn't missing anything – for a good hour. Sure, I can appreciate there being a mission restart option, but I also wish it wasn't necessary. It's otherwise a chill, easy game, so when it gets short and you have to backtrack, it pretty much kills some of the enjoyment.
Still, I'm aware that this is a SpongeBob game, so expectations were never going to be too high. If you're looking for a fun sandbox experience with lots of outfits to unlock, activities to complete, objectives to complete and just an open yet compact bikini bottom to explore, then I've no doubt you'll enjoy your time here, price tag aside. It's probably one I'll keep throwing at until I get the Platinum Trophy, just because it's one of those easy-to-play games.
Patrick Star Game is fun, and seeing the original cast return for it is a wonderful thing, but this deep-sea sandbox remains in relatively shallow water despite a rich history of references and callbacks. It's probably a safe bet to keep your kids entertained for quite some time, but for us adults who still have a soft spot for SpongeBob SquarePants, this is still a solid recommendation – just when the game is on sale and you're looking for something easy to mindlessly work away at .
